Karol Barac

I’ve always wanted to be a mother, as far back as I can remember. The honour of something so sacred as creating and nurturing life. I entered my 30s with three under six! Blessed. Run off my feet, hectic, exhausted but consciously grateful. Days a blur blended one into another as we made our way through nappies, readers, sports, and school drops offs. Busy, loud, happy kids. We had our fair share of broken bones, illnesses, and tantrums but our bond was unbreakable. Then one sunny afternoon, in the blink of an eye, our lives fell apart. A fatal accident took my beautiful, charismatic, talented middle child. Olivia was only 15. In that moment all the pieces that had come together fell apart and I knew, deep in my heart there’s more to life than a series of random events. Fuelled by love I began to search for answers: How  do I stay sane? How do I remain present for my family who need me more than ever?  How do I continue to guide them through this? But  most importantly,  where is Olivia? Because beneath the pain, I could still feel her! I immersed myself in studies of the soul and found scientists, psychologist, healers and mediums. What seemed more important was the need to find other mums who had experienced child loss. Mums who understand not just the trauma, complex pain and loss but the knowing our kids are not gone. Our kids are just not here like they used to be. Finding my tribe, helped me find myself and helped me remember that first and foremost, I am a mum. I will always be a mum, to three of the most amazing, incredible, wonderful children. Blessed.

Karen Shuster

I am mother to three extraordinary, loveable, unique sons including my middle son Morris in spirit. My grief journey began the day Morris was diagnosed with Ewings Sarcoma, but nothing could have prepared me for the loss that shattered every part of my existence when he passed. At my lowest point I was physically sick, unable to sleep, focus, or connect with anyone. Yet I was still going through the motions of life. I was fortunate to have support from family and friends and counselling, but this didn’t take the pain or loss away. What seemed most important was finding Morris. I embarked on a journey to find him and with the support of other bereaved mothers who had walked this path, I learnt that he is always with me. He is present at all the important and ordinary events in my life and shows up in the most miraculous ways. Knowing this gave me hope and slowly I was able to rebuild my life. It is very different, but it still includes Morris. My story is not yours, but my journey has taught me compassion and  has presented me with many tools that I would love to share with you.

Robyn  Bardas